OK people, another night, another showblog, and here’s what happened.
After my aborted attempt a few nights ago to get a photo taken with a genuine “Sheila” I finally had my chance tonight, when lo and behold there was a lady in the front row called Sheila.
Sheila told me she was from Carlisle, although she grew up in Lockerbie, with her husband Roy informing me he “crept over the border and dragged her back”. She also told me she was turning 63 in two days time, so I sent an audience member called Michael out with twenty of my own pounds, and the instructions to bring back a birthday present for Sheila from the Scottish shop up the hill.
While that happened though, I chanced upon a number of interesting accents in the audience. There was Mark, who was producing a play, studied at Oxford, and looked very much like someone who studied at Oxford. Jack, an Aussie with the sunniest face in the front four rows. Lina, a Swedish lady from Jonkoping (That name should have commas over something but not sure how to find them on my keyboard). And after bringing up Roy’s brother from Carlisle, and then realising Carlisle is actually in England, I found a Glaswegian who made the announcements at Edinburgh Haymarket railway station.
One by one I went along the line and had a conversation with each of them that contained no words, only the noises of each of their accents.
Eventually Michael returned with a swag of goodies for Sheila, and a beer for each of us
Since no right-minded Australian would drink a Foster’s, I gave it to Sheila and took a photo of something that everyone thinks is commonplace in Australia, but I had to go to Scotland to see: A Sheila drinking a Fosters.
While on the topic of national drinks, I added to my collection of “foreigners trying Irn Bru for the first time” by filming Lina the Swede having her first ever swig.You can watch it here:
Lina and I then sang the Swedish version of “Happy Birthday” to Sheila, before I rounded up the what was left of the international choir for a more familiar rendition. See if you can pick which is the Aussie, the Scot and the Oxford boy.
Oh, and if you’re wondering what Michael bought for Sheila for her birthday: a child’s Nessie t-shirt, a pair of skimpy ladies underwear featuring the flag of Scotland, a Scotland wristband, and 2 whisky-flavoured condoms. She seemed happy.
So did the Australian next to her who ended up drinking the Fosters, and Hector the stuffed toy raising money for the Sick Kids foundation. Click here to donate : www.justgiving.com/AdamHillsHector
That’s all for tonight, Happy Birthday Sheila, see y’all tomorrow