Mess Around LA – “Hollywood Hillsy”

Mess Around LA – “Hollywood Hillsy”

Hello all

…and greetings from sunny Los Angeles, where I am spedning a month living in the Hills, taking in the sounds and sights, and doing the occasional show (unpaid of course, if there is anyone from immigrations reading this).

I have booked myself into the Improv Comedy Lab on Melrose for the next three weeks, and decided to do some shows of Mess Around (free of course). Here’s what happened last night:

I took to the stage and was immediately confronted by two hot girls and a Ukrainian guy called Illusha. He looked like some sort of Eastern European mafia, so I decided to leave him alone, and talk to the ladies with him.

Both of the ladies were Australian, one of them was called Mem, and she told me (surprise surprise) she came to LA to be an actor. Her resume included a Roadside Assistance advert in Australia, for which she supplied the voice of an old lady. I asked her to recreate this, and to add to the effect I asked Reggie the Amazing Sound Guy to turn the lights out.

This only served to make things a little sexy, so I then decided we should make a little “old people porn”. Between Mem and I we voiced the parts of old people in a porn film.

As I said “Hello love, I’m here to clean your pipes”, Mem responded with a loud “What? Clean my what?”. She then invited me in, offered me a cup of tea, and Reggie The Amazing Sound Guy played some sexy porn music.

Well done to all involved, and by the way, this was Mem:


Apparently you can find out more about her on her website and even see the ad with the old lady voice.

The Ukrainian guy was still scaring me, and I was finding it hard to spot an audience member that wasn’t in the entertainment industry, but eventually I found a young man called Ryan, from Adelaide in Australia.

Ryan had come to LA to seek fortune and fame as… an accountant. Of course. Why else would you come to Hollywood? Unfortunately Ryan had no idea how to find a job as an accountant, so I decided he would become my cause.

I brought Ryan to the stage, posed him with the two hot ladies from the front row and took the following photo:


I then tweeted it, and said “This man is an accounatnt. What should his slogan be?”

My plan was that the winning slogan would then go on a poster for Ryan, which I would put up around LA.

There were plenty of responses both on twitter and my facebook page, and the best included:

  1. runboyrun71 2 Assets + 1 Liability
  2. collaberator it’s NOT an adding machine in my pocket …
  3. lhindle82 Pimp my accountancy pty ltd: I’ll get you out of the red….. And into the blonde!
  4. thinkthinkers I don’t know, but something there doesn’t add up.
  5. LizGiuffre by day he might look like a ‘square root’…. (sorry, don’t know if this will travel to US!)
  6. xponti I’m good at subtraction division and multiplying……
  7. collectivapathy Accountants do it without losing their balance! ?
  8. sparklez_hehe “Welcome to finance. The home of double entry”
  9. JAJDude As an accountant I know 1 + 2 = Threesome
  10. adros47 “Let me massage your figures”
  11. turnthebull When you have 2 birds in the hand who gives a shit about the bush!
  12. auran“I’m the exception to the rule”

It was decided that “1+2=threesome” was the winner, but in retrospect I’m not sure that should be going up in public. I checked my facebook page and also found:

Phylip Mcconnon I’m an accountant. I’m great with figures

I’m now kinda thinking that this might be the most appropriate phrase to use, what do you think?

At the very least, we now have a photo for the poster. I will  attempt to make a poster that can be displayed around LA with Ryan’s contact details on it, and a lovely Aussie couple in the crowd who are heading to Seattle and Vancouver on holidays said they would download it and post it there too.

A guy in the crowd called AJ said he would bring a camera next week and shoot an ad for Ryan. The lovely Amber J works at a company called Babelgum across the road from Ashton Kutcher’s company, and said she would put the poster up in a cafe there. She also suggested we get Ashton to tweet for us.

I now have a cause: to find Ryan a job before I leave Los Angeles.

I’m doing Mess Around every Thursday at 8.30pm at the Melrose Improv, so if you’re in LA feel free to drop in. I’m not kidding when I say tickets are free. Otherwise I will keep you updated on Ryan’s progrees via these blogs.

Oh, and if you’re interested, the blonde lady in the photo was called Natalie, and you can find out more about her here: Ahem. Might not want to access that one from your work computer.

That’s all for this week. I will now set myself the task of making a poster for Ryan, and will post it here once it is done.

Til next week, keep messin’



  • Toshi Boy

    11.09.2010 at 07:51 Reply

    laughing my butt off about trying to be an accountant in LA…. clever…

  • JAJDude

    11.09.2010 at 07:59 Reply

    What do you mean 1+2=Threesome shouldn’t be going up in public? Are you afraid of applied mathematics or something…? It’s a proven accounting formula!

  • Simon Dooley

    11.09.2010 at 08:08 Reply

    Great post. Looking forward to seeing the Jay Hitch poster. Let’s get the little Aussie battler a job!

  • Phill Channon

    11.09.2010 at 12:20 Reply

    Oh so we were the lovely Aussie couple then ?? 😉

    Top show mate, can’t wait to see the poster.. it seems appropriate that a photo like that ended up on an erection like the Seattle Space Needle ?

    I’ll check back here in a day or two, otherwise feel free to shoot me an email with the poster 🙂


  • Lauren

    11.09.2010 at 13:40 Reply

    If you need help creating the poster I might be able to help. I have Photoshop skills!! (And I’m currently studying Illustration)

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