And welcome to the week three report of the Adams Nectar Trial shows – the shows that help comedians work up new material, while encouraging audience members to become show offs.
Last night’s show began with the ongoing saga of Ruth – the teacher who was challenged to tell us a story of an inappropriate encounter with a student. I can report that after weeks of prodding, Ruth finally completed her homework, and delivered a mildly saucy tale of a Year 10 student who exited the pool at a Swimming Carnival minus his Speedos.
Although not overly inappropriate, it was deemed by all and sundry to have completed Ruth’s task, and she sat back down relieved. I then read Dave Hughes response to the corrections Ruth made to his last comment about her, which read “Ruth, good grammar is no substitute for good manners. Ps. I’m not sure if grammar is with an a or an e before the r and I’m too busy trying to make people laugh to look it up”
I have a feeling the feud may be over.
Next, Greg from Western Water was called upon. You may remember that I had challenged the audience and blog readers to contact Greg at Western Water, and do something to make him smile. I am happy to report that Greg had catalogued at least five incidents, which included a call from my own brother in LA referring to the nickname only he uses for me – “Nobend” (thanks bro); another call from Amanda suggesting “when choosing between two evils – choose the one that is closer because why would you want to get up?”; Steph, who told the joke about two eggs in a frypan, one said “Gee it’s hot in here”, the other one said “Shit, a talking egg!”; and a lovely email from Lisa Jane.
Greg did receive one message from a young lady in Sydney by the name of Morgan Freeman, who donated $40 to the bushfire appeal, and then asked if I could come up with a good response to all the jokes she receives about her name. I replied that I would open it up to blog responses, so here goes – at the end of this blog, please leave your response to the jokes that are made about a 17 year old white girl from Sydney called Morgan Freeman.
As Greg took his seat, task completed (much to the relief of his wife) he informed me that both he and Ruth are cooking up a practical joke to play on me. When I asked what it was, they mentioned the name of my high school Maths teacher. I don’t entirely know what they have planned, but I feel that I am being stalked by my own audience.
The first half of the show kicked off with the launch of Dick The Horse Productions, and performances by Hannah Gadsby, Adam Vincent and Wilson Dixon. I am producing all three acts at this year’s Melbourne International Comedy festival, and would urge you all to go online now and buy tickets for their shows at www.comeyfestival.com.au
The second half of the show kicked off with Geraldine Quinn, who brought down her 11 year old niece Caitlin’s response to the message we sent her last week while she was in hospital. It said that she was very grateful to receive our message, and that it finally took some attention away from her older brother. She then asked everyone to go see Auntie Geraldine’s show, so that she would stop borrowing money from Caitlin’s mother.
I then read out a few responses to last week’s blog, which asked for your worst teacher story. If you wanna read them all, well, you’ll have to go back to last week’s blog, but my personal favourites were the teacher that debated the use of Pokemon as a viable alternative energy source; the teacher that told a child he was an alien because he had diabetes; and the teacher that corrected a child’s assignment because “black swans don’t exist.”
It was then that we had a bit of bad news at The Nectar Lounge. Jono, our comedian to-be, tried out in a heat of Raw Comedy competition on the weekend, but failed to make it through. Whilst trying to work out what to do for him next week, he announced that next Sunday is actually his birthday. I then decided that next week, to cheer him up, we should throw Jono a birthday party.
Sadly, I will be in Sydney next week, hosting the TV broadcast of Tropfest, so I challenged the audience to bring presents (no more than two dollars), party food and streamers, and turn the day into a celebration of a red-headed comedy wannabe called Jono. I promised I would have a cake delivered for the occasion. It was then suggested that Jono should host the second half of the show, with Adam Rozenbachs steering the first part. Capital idea! If you’d like to leave a message for Jono’s birthady after this blog, feel free to do that too.
Back to the show, and the second half was filled with another beautiful song from Jessica Paige, whose work by the way can be found at www.myspace.com/jessicapaigemuso or www.jessicapaige.net. She was followed by Dave Callan, Adam Rozenbachs, another musical turn from Britt (check out the clip at www.adamsnectar.com) Asher Treleaven and Jeff Stilson.
I wrapped up the show, but not before being handed a note from a man called Andrew, who has written a theme song to the Adams Nectar shows; a song that will be debuted next week. I also found a man in the crowd called Bazil, who claims to be both a dancer and a contortionist. I of course challenged him to prepare a dance/contortion piece for us, to be unveiled in two weeks time.
So to wrap up – next week will be Jono’s Birthday Party, and you are invited to a) bring a $2 present b) leave a birthday message here or c) not turn up. Next week will also see the debut of the Adams Nectar Theme Song by Andrew, as well as new songs from Britt and Jess. Ruth and Greg will continue to plan their revenge and Bazil will keep working on his dance routine.
Most importantly, we will try to find an appropriate response for a seventeen year-old girl called Morgan Freeman to give when ribbed about her name. Your suggestions are welcome and encouraged. Adam Rozenbachs will write the blog next week in my absence, but it will still be posted here, and on my website www.adamhills.com as well as the Adams Nectar website.
Thanks again to all involved, and especially the audience who donated another $260 to the Red Cross Bushfire Appeal. This now takes our total to around $600.
I look forward to hearing what happens next week, and to reading your suggestions for Morgan. Thanks for reading, and thanks for coming to the shows