I need your help for this blog. Specifically, I need the help of a woman halfway up the aisle, who started taking photos of me as I met latecomers. She didn’t know the latecomers, she just decided to take a photo of me meeting them. I then posed with said latecomers, and for some reason, decided we should take a photo of me in a sexually provocative pose with everyone that came in late.
There was a conga line, a threesome, and some one-on-ones, and all of them were recorded on the camera of a lady who promised to send them to me. As soon as they arrive, I’ll post them.
For the moment though I can show you the photos I took of a man that arrived wearing what seemed to be a packed parachute :
And an enormous New Yorker in the front row called Matt, who I asked to stand guard over my stalker Maria (yes, she’s coming to every show).
Matt then sat on stage with me and helped me to rehearse a script for an audition I have next week for a sitcom. I have to adopt an American accent, so Matt and I read the script out, with him playing the part of my twelve year old son, whose voice seemed to get higher with every line. Matt’s wife filmed the whole thing and also promised to send it to me. Again as soon as I get it I’ll post it – then send it off as my audition tape.
A short blog I know, but as soon as the photos arrive, I will upload them. That’s assuming you want to see a procession of random stranger staking me from behind.
I finished last night off with a lovely gig at the Festival Club, where I MC’d for James Tinniswood, Nick Grimwood and the fabulous Hannah Gadsby. I was ably assisted by the 80s tennis playing doctor, the cross-legged American midget, the British Cell Biologist and the Belgian Porn Star (all in the audience of course)
That’s all for today’s blog, I’ll keep em coming