Mess Around Edinburgh – August 10 “An Aussie, A Scotsman and a Dutchman walk into a bar”

Mess Around Edinburgh – August 10 “An Aussie, A Scotsman and a Dutchman walk into a bar”

Hi all

After a day off it was back into it tonight, with an audience that seemed to be a collection of national stereotypes.

First up were Kay and Mick from Australia. I thought Mick was the ultimate Aussie name, but the more I found out about him, the Aussier it got. Mick was from a place called Ocean Grove. Of course. He was with his wife Kay, but wasn’t wearing his wedding ring. Why? He lost it in the surf.


Next up was a Dutchman in the front row who appropriately had a small goatee beard but no moustache. From what I could tell his name was Joast, and his surname could well have been “Hooayallen”. I’m not sure.

The more I spoke to Joast, the more amused he seemed to be by my impression of him. In particular he wanted to know why we all think they pronounce “s” as “sh”. As in “You are being shilly”

I then decided that we would both say the word “sausages” and see how it differed. First though I found a Scotsman called David to say it in a Scottish accent. I couldn’t work out why the Scotsman pronounced it “shaushages”, until he smiled – he had no front teeth.

So there was an Aussie called Mick from Ocean Grove who lost his ring in the surf, a Dutchman with a goatee, and a Scot with no teeth.

I took a photo of all three, and asked the twitterers which one they thought was the Scot, the Aussie and the Dutchman:


Well done to those who said (from left to right) Scot, Aussie, Dutch.

Well done also to James in the front row, who works in Cambridge as a research scientist in biomedicine, is married to a lovely lady called Frances, and was wearing a Slayer T shirt. He demonstrated some lovely English headbanging for us all.

Finally I called young Lenny to the stage. Lenny is of course the ten year old who came to my show on Sunday, stole the show, then took Honker for a day out. Honker is of course the stuffed toy given to me by an audience member on opening night who has bcome the mascot of my show. Feel free to read previous showblogs to get the whole story.

Honker is now fronting our charity drive for the Royal Hospital for Sick Children, and was taken for a day out in Edinburgh by Lenny, with a camera crew tagging along. Among shots of Honker with the Fawlty Towers Show cast:


Honker visited The Real Mary King’s Close, where a lovely lady called Lisa from The Close donated 1000 pounds to our campaign!


Honker also apparently visited the Scottish whisky museum


But got a little carried away


Thanks so much to the good folk at Edinburgh Spotlight, the amazing folk at Real Mary King’s Close, and the wonderful Lenny, who brought Honker back in one piece, with a brand new kilt:


Tomorrow, a lovely lady called Gillian is taking Honker to visit the Irn Bru factory. Maybe they can convince Irn Bru to help us out with some sponsorship. I’ll have the photos for you tomorrow.

You can still follow Honker on twitter here –

On facebook here –

And you can donate here –

Thanks to the amazing generosity of Real Mary King’s Close, we are now up to 1665 pounds.


Let’s keep it coming.

I’ll do some more work on making Honker famous, and I’ll get back to you tomorrow.

Til then, Honk



  • Sue

    11.08.2010 at 19:26 Reply

    l love Honkers kilt and the wee sporran. Looking forward to reading more about Honker’s adventures tomorrow. Oh, and the show too of course 🙂

    Did your missing, well travelled clothing arrive eventually?



  • Mick Drew

    12.08.2010 at 22:09 Reply

    Hi Adam,

    Thanks for an interesting night. Not sure how I explain to my friends back home though.

    1. At 4.55 pm Kaye and I had no idea what show to see, so we ambled to the box office at the Assembly. Two of the queues were full but one was empty so I took the empty one and was asked at 4.59 what I wanted. I asked if there were tickets to Adam Hills show tonight expecting a “no we are sold out” and was told to wait a moment while she checked. 5:00 pm my answer was yes two tickets have just been released.
    2. We sit in middle of theatre. Kaye goes to toilet. I hear two people behind say that if you are in front row you bacome part of show. I sigh in relief that we were so far back because previous night at CRACK I was in front row and asked to stand whilst the female sword swallowing host asked for a kiss. I bent to kiss her on cheek and she promptly plants a kiss on my lips.
    3. So to my horror, Kaye appears in theatre after you enter, and you follow her up with microphone. Ask her name Kaye. Ask her she is with. I say me, You ask me to stand, you ask my name. I say Mick—all the theatre laughs???? You ask us to come on stage –ohoh. You ask ou last name. I say Drew, audience howls????? You ask where we are from. I say Ocean Grove. Audience is hysterical. You ask if we are married but notice I am not wearing my wedding ring. I explain I lost it in surf. Audience is beside themself?????
    4. So the audience has had a VERY good time because my name is Mick Drew, married to Kaye, I live in Ocean Grove and I lost my wedding ring. How do I explain to my friends the joke???? These Scottish audiences are strange. No woder you come to Edinburgh OR you are brilliant and making the ordinary- funny.
    5. Well done.
    6. We had a very entertaining night and will make a donattion to HonkerSick kids. Thanks

  • Catriona Provan

    13.08.2010 at 07:05 Reply

    Hi Adam,
    Me (the girl you probably wont remember given the other personalities but the one who suggested the word sausages) and the boyfriend (who is regretting not sitting in the front row) just wanted to say thatnks so much for a fantastic way for us to spend our first fringe and that its an excellent format for a show! we’re now trying to budget a way to get to more shows.
    Thanks again and good luck with Honker

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