Mess Around UK 2011 – London Night 8

Mess Around UK 2011 – London Night 8

Hello all,

I am going to keep it short and sweet tonight, mainly cos I am getting a little run down and need me bed.

I wasn’t sure how tonight’s show ended up where it did until an audience member managed to clarify it for me afterwards.

Basically here are the steps:

1) I notice that a guy in the front row has a Blackberry on his lap, and he has a message.

2) I check the message and find it is an email with the subject “The Silent Poo”

3) I read the email and see it is a link to a Youtube video entitled “Poop Splash Elimination”

4) We watch the video and find it is an experiment to find how to do a poo in a toilet without getting splashback. (If you’re interested you can view it here – )

5) I ask Sachin (the man in question) why he has this email, and he tells me it stemmed from a conversation he and his friends had about how to do a silent poo

6) I ask if this has anything at all to do with his work. He says no. I ask what he does for a living. He tells me he works at a prostate awareness charity.

7) I start talking about prostate awareness, and another audience member claps. Turns out she works for a different prostate awareness charity.

8) I then decide that we need to create a decent slogan for prostate awareness and send out a tweet looking for suggestions. Someone in the room shouted “Up yours” and we were off.

The audience’s favourite tweets were:

2FBS Stephen C – Give Prostate Cancer The Finger !
chaskitchen Charles Cunningham – “don’t be a sphincter”
ChepstowCupcake Helen Child Villiers – bend over so you don’t keel over!! x
but the winner in a unanimous decision was
Jellyflaw Jennifer! – No Joke; Be a bloke, get a poke.
I then  took a photo of Sachin and am determined to turn it into a poster for prostate awareness with the slogan “No joke; be a bloke, get a poke”
I am quite average at these things however, so if anyone reading this blog has any skill with graphic design I’d be chuffed to bits if you could turn the above photo into a poster with said slogan.
In news of the heart I also received a tweet from Emily, the lady chosen to go on a date with Alistair, the single young man for whom I spent all last week trying to find a date.  Turns out their date was meant to be tonight, but Alistair cancelled. The cad! the bounder! The out and out sod!
Emily reminded me that I said I would find her a date if it didn’t work out with Alistair, so I scoured the audience for a single man. Apparently the only one was Sachin, so he will now return later in the week as one of Emily’s possible suitors, in the ongoing saga of “Love Soho Style” (never google that phrase)
Finally I must mention an American man in the audience who went by the name of, and I’m not kidding, Aurelien Nakraw. There is no doubt in my mind he is from another planet, and was stalking the prostate people to find out how to anally probe humans without arousing suspicion.
That’s all for tonight, I will be back tomorrow with another blog that will hopefully come a step closer to finding love for Emily, and awareness for prostates.
Til then


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